Thursday, 10 January 2013

2013 starts

Another year is starting. Soon it'll be time to start some training. Travelling with Sean to his CX races, feeling that race-specific excitement there, smelling the adrenaline in the air, it all warms me up to the idea of racing again. What I need this year the most is to see some progress, so it's time to train well (notice well, not hard) and play with the races as I go.

Cycling through the darkness last morning, the thoughts of where I am in my cycling life were flying through my head. It's actually not as bad as I thought, I haven't been cycling all that long, all breaks considered.
2009 - Taking up cycling.
2010 - First racing season, jogging, cycling, turbo-training, and a complete burn-out at the end of that time of the crazy newbie's eagerness :)
2011 - Studies combined with a full-time job, hardly any cycling done over the year, random races here and there and still some nice results gotten. Raced mainly because I had been shouting so loud about creating the S2 category for women so when that goal was achieved I had to show my face at some S2 races :) In the autumn: hiking and spending a month walking the Camino de Santiago.
2012 - A come-back to regular cycling after nearly a 1.5-year break. An ambitious plan, great base training, good feelings. But then some sickness, taking up a new job, cancelling races, the training plan torn in pieces due to working weekends, sliding downwards physically and mentally. Should have stopped it then but instead pushed even harder - not good. Instead of racing in S2 category as planned, a spontaneous upgrade to S1 (the first S1 race). Maybe not the most satisfactory performance shown in that season but still, I wasn't eaten alive. Huge amount of sacrifice made to continue training, the output not meeting the input even closely. But what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger, right? It will pay off. It has to.
Not bad after all.
I still slide down spectacularly every now and then but generally it's all going upwards now. Hard work to do, but most needed.

And now 2013 is beginning.
If anything, I've learnt a lot last year. I've learnt where my friends are. I've learnt that I can push myself through anything even if it's not good for me - now it's time to learn where and how to stop, sometimes. It's frustrating at the moment but I'll learn. I'm more humble now.
Now it's a journey to find peace and balance. To calm down. To stop during a spin and look around. To lie down on the floor and close the eyes when tired instead of pushing through that tiredness. Time to reconcile.

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